Loosing a Beloved Pet

Loosing someone we love is one of the hardest things we will ever have to deal with as human beings. It could be a friend, parent, aunt, child, grandparents, or even a pet. It is never easy and I am still struggling through reality myself. On Thursday April 29, 2010 at 5:00pm my Beagle Abbigail breathed her last breath.

Lady Abbigail Cassiopeia was born in June of 2001. She was gorgeous! I first saw Abby when she was just 5 weeks old. She was so small and sweet. She came home at 8 weeks old. Abby and I were the best of friends. She would cuddle up to me all the time and sleep, being so content. She was not your typical Beagle. Abby did bark some but she rarely bayed. In 2003 I left for college for two years. At the end of every quarter I would fly home. The biggest thing I looked forward to was greeting Abby. You know on Peanuts how Snoopy would do the Beagle dance? Well, that is what Abbigail did. She would bay and howl at the top of her lungs and jump around on her hind legs. Honestly, it sounded like someone was killing her. Neighbors would come out of their houses to see if everything was alright. But I loved it!

In September of 2009 Abby started to go downhill. She develops small lumps over her body. We took her to the vet who did blood work and took aspirations of the lumps. She didn't find any cancer which was a great thing and her blood work all came back normal. But something still wasn't right. Those small lumps started to get bigger and bigger and eventually covered her whole body. She started to put on weight from the retained fluid. Abby has always weighed about 30lbs but not anymore. Abby started to show some real signs that she was in pain.

We spent months debating about what to do. In April of 2010 Abby said enough and started giving up on life. She didn't eat with the same enthusiasm, would sleep all day on our couch and wouldn't even move her head when we told her to go outside at night. It was time. So the horrible day came. We took Abbigail to the vet and placed her on a blanket. My parents and I sat on the floor by her and we held her and talked to her and cried. Abby now weights 44lbs. The vet gave her a sedative to keep her calm. I fed her treats galore. Abby laid down next to us and she placed her head on my foot. Our vet came back into the room and administered the euthanasia drug and Abby very peacefully left this earth. It was the worst moment of my life. She was gone and I would NEVER see her again. We cried and pet Abby for a long while. Leaving her was so difficult and I just wanted to keep touching her and not let go.

Abby is gone and I am really struggling with how to grieve. There are times I just cry and cry and then other times that I couldn't cry if I wanted to. Sometimes I forget she is gone and when I see our other Beagle Roxy I think it's her. And then there are times that my mind plays tricks on me and I don't even remember she existed. Before Abby died we made a memorial stone in her honor. That stone is going to sit outside in the spot where Abby always laid in the sun. We will never forget Abby. She was my first dog and best friend.

People grieve in very different ways and there is no right or wrong. It's important to let yourself grieve. Don't try and hide it. There are some who say, "It's just a dog". But they are missing out because my animals are my family and I would do anything for my family. I probably grieve for her more than I do my extended family sorry to say. But I know them inside and out and they know everything about me. So be true to your pet and grieve and let it go. Remember the good times. Make a memorial for them; plant a tree, do a paw print, have your pets ashes returned. Whatever it may be it should be special to you.

Below is a poem called the Rainbow Bridge and it gives me such comfort and sadness at the same time.

This posting is to honor Lady Abbigiail Cassiopeia and all that she gave us in her years on this earth. Goodbye my dear friend.

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Rainbow Bridge

Author Unknown

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Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.

There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.

There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.

The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....